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Old 10-18-2007, 12:24 PM
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Default I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

Ok, I know I'm not supposed to post here since I'm definately a guy. But I wanted to get a ladies perspective on this.

Well, I've slowly been easing my girlfriend into fishing and shes starting to like it more. Only problem is she gets frustrated quickly and then decides she hates it. I got her an ultralight spinning rod and shes been having good success with inline spinners but heres the kicker... when and how should I get her to try and catch a fish on a fly? How did you girls all get sucked into this sport and how can I keep her interested even if she doesn't catch one the first time out with a flyrod?

Thanks in advance for any help!!!
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Old 10-20-2007, 12:36 PM
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Default Re: I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

It was a reeeeaaaalllly long time ago for me, but basically I was taken to a lake that I couldn't miss. Caught fish on top, in the middle and down deep....what a concept and all done with a different fly.
I do recommend talker her into taking a class. They will teach her not only how, but why.
Be careful however, my Hubby did this for me and now I guide and teach, so in all, the student surpassed the teacher.
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Old 10-20-2007, 02:16 PM
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Default Re: I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

I can tell that you are young by your question and this is a huge question. Remember that women and men think differently (I am working hard at being nice). I just explained to my son yesterday that although they can drive us crazy, he will look back on his life when he is older and see that the worldly things that have brought him the most joy, fulfillment, frustration and confusion will all be related to a woman. Men are basic creatures, based upon logic and stimulus. Women are (uh?????) not men.

On to the advise.

1. Do not try to force her, convince her or coerce her. This will only lead to resistance. As with all of us, she must WANT to do it.

2. It must be fun for HER! If she likes going out with a spinning rig - God bless her and let her have fun. If this is the only form of fishing she ever likes, consider yourself lucky and enjoy having a good looking fishing buddy.

3. Put down your fly rod from time to time and enjoy a spinning rod with her. Do not make her think that spinning is a lower life form activity. The more fun she has, the more she will get hooked (figuratively and literally). The more she gets hooked the more she will want to try new aspects of the sport. Remember - most of us did not start with a fly rod in our hands. We got "hooked" drowning worms, eggs, liver, etc. and then thought that throwing a lure looks like more fun (at least more activity in my ADD case). Then we went - wow that fly thing looks really cool. I get to play IN the water and at the same time look like I has transcended those people on the bank - I have evolved. Give her the same chance to grow into the sport!

4. If this does not work and it is still important to you that she picks up a fly rod, you must do what has worked for thousands of years. Spend lots of money on her! In our pre-marriage years of my wife liked to go camping, but had no interest in fishing. My fishing buddy came up with the idea of hiring a guide and taking a float trip for two days. We decided to invite the girls to join us, let them shop the first day and then on the boat for day two (this way we got in one good day of fishing and they got in one good day of shopping - all Gods chillen be happy). Day two with the girls, we were in the boat for about 5 min. when my future wife said "I think I have something". The guide and I both looked up at her rod tip and said that it was just the bottom she felt (bouncing row). We then heard, "no I have something"! I looked up again (reminding myself that it will be a long day, I had a good day yesterday and that she was just a girl) and saw her pole bend in half. Figuring that Mr. Salmon had just set the hook himself, I told her to keep the tip up and reel in any slack while the guide and I were getting the other lines out of the water. To make a long story short, she landed a 29 lb. salmon and on the way home all she wanted to talk about was how much boats cost. What I was thinking about was - I am going to marry this girl.

5. Everything changes after marriage! After the wedding she only went fishing with me one more time, when my buddy and I spent the money to take the wives to Mexico, Marlin fishing (and yes, she went shopping and caught the biggest fish - again). But, she gave me a son and daughter who both fish (unfortunately my daughter moved away and only fishes with her husband now). My son is the best time I have ever had! He got his first bass at the age of 3 (with a little help from dad) and has had his own fly rod since 6. He is now 11 and addicted to catching anything that swims, by any means. He wants to explore all aspects of the sport and has no pre-conception of fishing social status or artistry. To him (and most of us should learn from him) casting a fly is fun but no better than a worm and bobber. All means are equal in his eyes, as long as it works and he has fun!

6. Been with my wife for over 20 yrs. She does not fish, but the marriage has given me a great fishing partner in my son. Would I rather my wife fish with us - I still buy her licenses in hope she will surprise me and say yes the next time I ask her to join us. Perhaps it's time to get out the check book again and book a trip to Mexico.

Unfortunately life is much more than fishing, appreciate and be thankful for what you have. Do not dwell on what you want

Good luck,
Bill
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Old 10-23-2007, 09:40 PM
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Default Re: I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

I love that post, thankyou for all the insight!
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Old 10-24-2007, 10:56 AM
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Default Re: I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

One thing I will add. When I started I had a cheap outfit and it was heavy and clumbsy, so I kept going back to my ultra light spinning. Then I got an Old Sage set-up (which I wish I still had) and what a world of difference! I never went back to spinning again.
So, all you guys that are giving the gal "HANDMEDOWNS" think about how you would like that...I am not talking top of the line but, don't skimp on her gear either. And I have seen on the rivers, the guys set the gal up with what they are using...tell them what to do...watch for a second, then walk off to catch fish leaving her with what you think she needs.
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Old 10-24-2007, 01:14 PM
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Default Re: I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

yeah, even when she's using a spinning rod I act as her "guide". My line doesn't get in the water too much when were both out together but its fun to see her catch fish
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Old 10-30-2007, 03:13 PM
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Default Re: I turn to you guys(or girls in this case)

When my husband taught me to fly fish, he taught the family. We have two daughters. We all learned at the same time. We learned on the lawn first, how to cast. Then we moved to easy streams with cooperative fish.

My first advise is don't get frustrated - especially when she misses a hook up. We know what we've done wrong after the fact and that is how we learn, don't be too disapointed. I sometimes took Jeff's disapointment in not getting a fish as being disapointed with me. Not so! Also take baby steps, don't overload with too much information. Make sure you are not giving conflicting information. I spent my first season being taught "no wrist" and mastered that then next season I was supposed to use some wrist, confusing.

My husband and I are both guides and he taught at a school. About the second season at the school he became an excellent teacher. He had to learn to pressent the material. I suggest getting her a lesson with a guide or an instructor - less pressure on both of you. We went on a float trip on day and the guide explained to me what "Shock the rod" meant. Jeff had been telling me that for two seasons, I had no idea, it took another person's explination for me to get it. Sometimes we are too familiar with our other half and it gets in the way. We assume they will understand the terminology.

Men's and women's attention span is different - keep this in mind! Jeff can fish all day even if the water is unproductive. He is happy to change flies, change techniques and keep at it. I find that if the water is not producing and I have to change flies more then 5 times, its not fishing time. Take her out with a good hatch so there is action. Pack a lunch for down times, point out flowers and trees. They have some good books on streamside wildflowers. Get her a fishing journal, this way when the fishing is dull she can write about how much fun she is having with you. Make it fun.

One last thing, watch were you wade. Remember some places that you can go she might not be able to, get her a wading staff.

Always include a nice dinner after a day out on the water. Sometimes it is not the fishing that I love but just being with my favorite fishing partner.

Good Luck
Flymom
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