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  #21  
Old 09-09-2016, 12:37 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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Originally Posted by GrtLksMarlin View Post
Ah yes, the Crescent Roll mini-dogs...Those are not Coney Dogs. Although, if you had a pile of those like that, heaped on some cheese, Coney sauce, onions (maybe some hot peppers) and topped it with mustard and hot sauce, you might just have something

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Old 09-09-2016, 04:15 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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Originally Posted by GrtLksMarlin View Post
How are you with Barley + Hops + Water?
And yeast.

---------- Post added at 05:15 PM ---------- Previous post was at 05:14 PM ----------

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  #23  
Old 09-09-2016, 04:19 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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Originally Posted by GrtLksMarlin View Post
Now I realize that this thread is going to both confuse some folks who are ignorant to finer fare not living in the Midwest, and then make others extremely jealous in that only a few of us live near the axis of the planet regarding this ambrosia of the gods, being S.E. Michigan. Never the less, here it is.

>>>WARNING<<<
Put on your drool bibs NOW!

May I present to you Common-sewers of fine dining, the Coney Island Hot Dog:

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Not just any old hot dog with this that or the other put on, but the Coney Island Hot Dog, or Coney Dog for the anxious to order masses, having actually nothing to do with Coney Island, N.Y., yet a phenomenon that spread through the Midwest. Initially the focal point item of Greek or Macedonian immigrant restaurants know as Coney Island's, who's hallmark is super fast service, always freshly cooked food, great breakfasts, awesome coffee and naturally, Coney Dogs.


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Odd as it may be, the first instance of a "Coney Island Hot Dog" is considered to have been in 1914 with both Ft. Wayne's Famous Coney Island Wiener Stand in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, and Todoroff's Original Coney Island in Jackson, Michigan, opening that year. Naturally the Detroit Historical Society lists it as Detroit in 1917, and who wouldn't fight over bragging rights for inventing this masterpiece of culinary perfection.

As with all things, there are some very firm rules about what exactly constitutes a Coney Dog. It must be a natural casing, hot dog, wiener or what ever you call it fine ground Vienna paste sausage. It MUST be cooked upon a griddle that everything else is cooked on, and naturally the longer it sits there, the better it is. The griddle must NEVER be washed! You may only scrape off the old residue, and typically at the finest of Coney Islands that serve just the basic fare, the dogs are lifted off via the cooks bare fingers!

However, that is simply a good hot dog...

To make a Coney Dog, you then must place it in a "steamed" white flour bun, dowse it liberally with a Beef Heart based Chili sauce, which is so unique it is actually Coney Sauce, beans included in the sauce risks execution or banishment to flip burgers at McDonalds. White Onions which MUST be crisp, the fineness of cut, debatable (finer the better IMO), and finally, a liberal 3-streaks or single tight squiggle of yellow, not brown, yellow mustard...and it MUST be shoved at and before you as though saying "hurry up and eat it, and get OUT!.

Besides your taste-buds reveling in their joy, you will instantly recognize that after you feel almost giddy. Satisfied and rejoicing in the perfectly balanced flavors that do not leave your mouth. In fact, you must be careful to not let the Coney Sauce itself to touch your skin. The scent will last for days even though you are tempted not to wash them but do, and I have literally from our local area had numerous people who will wherein upon you walking into a room, bug out their eyes, start sniffing the air, walk directly to you and state "you ate at _____ _____! How was it?!"

Why they ask that last is beyond me. They know how it was, it was amazing, the mystery of life, the nectar of the gods, and a slice of heaven on a bun. What is more amazing though is, I have had women, think about that a second, men are pigs, but a woman? Women ask me (not joking here), if they could "smell my fingers." Why I grew a mustache, that way I get more smoochin.


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Now don't get me wrong. Once you are delivered your Coney Dog, you can do any damn thing you want to it. However, there must be those basic ingredients. Louisiana Hot Sauce my preferred pepper sauce for it's vinegary flavor (in fact first tried at Coney Joe's (more on that in a minute)), most lean toward Pete's Red Hot, or whatever else one may choose to customize, or more screw up perfection to our own tastes.

Now I'm a firm believer that sweet pickle relish is for those who have not grown up. Sharp Dill pickle slices I suppose I can wrap my head around (not really, I'm lying, they have no place on a Coney)...Relish much like putting ketchup on a Coney Dog, pure blasphemy! Kid stuff, blech! That said, the local Legion Hall (more on them later) has a rather unique "Hot Relish" which I believe is more pepper based, and boy it's hot, and wow, it is deeeeelicious!

Now I get it, there are a lot of delicious hot dog styles....


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...In fact, without question the best dog I ever had in my life was just a couple years ago at a local bar which they called a "Yankee Hot Dog." Not NY Yankee, but New England. 1-pound select dog, wrapped in apple wood smoked bacon, celery salt, pepper, vinegar based slaw, tomatoes, red onion, dill pickles, some special sauce and lord knows what else. It was so orgasmically wondrous that I wish I had worn protection.

Never the less, it was NOT a Coney Dog.


With all that behind us however, it brings me to the point. S.E. Michigan has long been the axis of the Coney Dog world. Though many will claim the numerous standards of Detroit, others Flint, fact of the matter since 1972 there has been only one. Ranked the best year after year, my first experience with it in 1975, that being...

Coney Joe's of Brighton!

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Unfortunately, just this year this landmark, the home of truly the worlds greatest Coney Dog (and Chili Cheese Fries) has closed its doors and is up for sale. No doubt to never come back as it was, and the same (I hear they have even been wearing food service gloves! WTH?).

Never the less I live in S.E. Michigan, so there must be a suitable replacement to get by. Now of late I have been restraining myself to 2x/month going to the Legion Hall (more on them in a minute), however, a couple weeks ago the wife wanted to go to a Lion's Game (why?) and that gave me an opportunity to do something that all REAL men dream of...

To sample a Coney Dog at EACH of the Detroit landmark restaurants.

Now I have tried Coney Dogs all around the state, and most Coney Islands in the counties surrounding us with their inferior offerings. Some are, okay, others ehh, and some belch, patuiee! Making me want to spit more than a Woodward...well never mind that. None of them even close to Coney Joe's.

Yes, I've tried Angelo's in Flint, not even close...

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Even some posers elsewhere with their monstrosities...

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But none of them were close, with everyone telling me that I have to go hither, tither and yon in Detroit in that they have the BEST Coney there!
HA! Impossible! Bahahaha!
Never the less, that day I hit numerous legends in the Coney world, sampling one at each...
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...and I won't bore you with the rest, but SIX Coney joints in all, and they were pathetic renderings of the ultimate food group.
Which brings us to the American Legion Memorial Post #419 in Pinckney, Michigan. Within walking distance, crawling if you drink too much there and eat too many Coneys at $1.50 EACH (they were $1.25).
Click the image to open in full size.
Yeah, yeah, I know what you are saying. "That's not a Coney Joint?!" Well who cares in that compared to the old Coney Joe's they were just a smidge away from being as good as. With their hot relish...Well, almost better.
But Coney Joe's was going downhill since the Ol'Man died. His Daughters put up a great fight for a long time keeping up the tradition...Yet it has faded. Still better than anywhere else, I give my nod to Post 419.
Even though only serving Coney Dogs and Rootbeer Floats (oh and heavy poured booze) on the 1st and 3rd Thursday of every month from 5:00PM-7:30PM, they are by far, by a vast margin, the finest epicureal purveyors of the all-mighty CONEY DOG!...I do therefor proclaim them without question to be the VERY best in the world! Lack of Coney Chili Cheese Fries (idely with onions and mustard, and LHS) regardless. All hail American Legion Post 419!
Now tell me you're not hungry!
B.E.F.
Quite an exposť...You hit 'em all, except maybe the Leo's chain, which is no great shakes, or Dimitri's.
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  #24  
Old 09-09-2016, 11:26 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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Originally Posted by lanyard View Post
Quite an exposť...You hit 'em all, except maybe the Leo's chain, which is no great shakes, or Dimitri's.
Have done Leo's, Lucas, Grecian/Mimi's, etc., etc., never Dimitri's though. With Coney Joe's around, they were all simply disappointing at best, and now with post 419, I've found my place. I was just surprised at how shockingly bad the old Detroit standards were in comparison. I'm not sure if Joe's is still open while they try and sell it...If it is you should try it.

Otherwise, 2x a month at Legion Hall for what I feel are the best now is good enough for me.

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Old 09-10-2016, 12:41 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

I've been hearing people brag about Angelo's forever, surprised you panned them...never been.
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  #26  
Old 09-10-2016, 01:04 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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Originally Posted by lanyard View Post
I've been hearing people brag about Angelo's forever, surprised you panned them...never been.
Panned is a bit harsh, but they're not close to the two I mention as the best. Then again, go to all three (if Joe's is still open) and prove me wrong...Sounds like a win-win for you no matter what

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  #27  
Old 09-10-2016, 01:26 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

I'm wondering . . .
what does a true believer like GrtLksMarlin et. al. do when you stop in to an A&W fast food outlet and see a skinless dog on an ordinary bun with some chili and onions on it labeled: "Coney Dog"?

Do you react in shock and incredulousness over the sacrilege? Stomp out in rage? Avoid such fast food joints like the plague?
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  #28  
Old 09-10-2016, 01:33 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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Originally Posted by mtbusman View Post
I'm wondering . . .
what does a true believer like GrtLksMarlin et. al. do when you stop in to an A&W fast food outlet and see a skinless dog on an ordinary bun with some chili and onions on it labeled: "Coney Dog"?

Do you react in shock and incredulousness over the sacrilege? Stomp out in rage? Avoid such fast food joints like the plague?
If it's a Tuesday I give them about two bucks so I can have two. They co-habitate convenience stores around here.

Oh, guess you weren't talking to me.
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  #29  
Old 09-10-2016, 02:36 PM
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

I'm speechless, there's nothing I can add but I have an almost overwhelming urge to make this thread a Sticky due to the through job of addressing the topic.

If you will include a snapshot of the nippers constructed using the dentures this would be the most interesting thread ever submitted to the Lodge Den threads Brad.

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  #30  
Old 09-10-2016, 04:49 PM
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Cuisine of the Commonsewer...
 
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Default Re: Cuisine of the Commonsewer...

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At my house that meal means we should have went to the grocery store about a week ago. Act now or tomorrow it will be Cream of Mushroom soup and don't be expecting no crackers with it.
Woozer Big Dog .. now don't you be thinkin' dissin' Cream of Mushroom soup. You want a 'white gravy' the first thing you pull out is a large can and a small can of extra 'shrooms.' Pork Chops, with this for gravy .. Food Fit For The Gods!


Tent side meals .... 'Is it ready yet????' Even done this (with fried eggs/hash spuds) for breakfasts. Twit's scarfed it down, rain was pouring down, clanking of spoons on metal plates in their tents. Don't forget to make far more coffee than you think you'll need for this PACK OF WOLVES ... you will be wrong on your guess.

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